Keeping Calm and Relaxed When Stressed

Life can be full of stressful situations, maybe you have been working hard lately or perhaps money is tight, and you need to reduce your budget. Whatever the reason, these events can cause you to feel stressed and unable to function as well as you would like. If you don’t try to deal with your stress, it can quickly become a big problem that affects all aspects of your life. Here are some of the ways that you can learn to deal with your stress and keep calm.

Breathe Slowly

When you are starting to feel anxious or stressed, your breathing will increase, and that can make the situation worse. To try and stop this from happening, you need to make a conscious effort to slow your breathing down. It will be hard to do at first, as your body will want to fight it, but after a while, you will start to breathe slowly and evenly. You should breathe deeply through your nose and out through your mouth. As you do this, you should start to feel your anxiety and stress getting less.

Distract Yourself

In most cases, the times you start to get stressed is when there is an event coming up, or you start to think of things that worry you. It is important that you try to distract your brain from focusing on these things and instead do something else. There are many ways that you can distract yourself; you can count backward from 100, draw a figure-eight in the palm of your hand, or play a game on your mobile phone. If you have distracted yourself effectively, then you should start to feel calmer and better able to think effectively about what is worrying you.

Take Some Time Out

Sometimes being in a busy place or having others around you can make the feelings of stress worse. When this happens, you should try to move yourself out of the situation and spend some time on your own. If you have children with you, then try to engage them in something like truth or dare questions for kids so you can have some time to calm down. Use the deep breathing and the distraction techniques to assist you.

Be Prepared

One of the reasons you can get stressed and anxious is when things happen that you aren’t expecting. It can be particularly bad for those that like to have everything planned and organized. To try and remove this worry, do your best to plan things in advance. Not everything can be planned or organized, but if you can, then this will enable you to measure your emotions and prepare yourself for the event. If you have a bad memory, then add reminders to important events or things in your diary. That way, they won’t come as a surprise or be missed altogether.

Learning to manage and deal with your stress is the best way to keep yourself from getting too upset.

What Happened to Deadpool?!

Like most of us, I have been waiting eagerly for over two years to see Deadpool 2.  I was so excited about this premiere, that I donned my Deadpool shirt, jacket, necklace, and socks and drove to a theater located an hour and a half away from my house, because it was the only one around showing the Deadpool double feature (at a mighty $28 price tag, I might add). No part of me had even considered that this movie would be short of amazing. Boy, was I wrong!

Major spoilers ahead! Don’t read if you haven’t seen it and plan to.

I loved Deadpool more than any other movie of the 2010s. Partly because of the humor and original take on superheroes (a genre that I keep up with religiously), partly because it came to me at a time when I was dealing with the cancer diagnosis of a close family member and the fact that Wade got his powers because of a sort of cancer treatment was pretty awesome, but mainly because of the smart writing. The latter sure went down the tubes in this installment.

Let’s start with that beginning. Vanessa gets shot and killed. It seems that ever since Batman V Superman, these new superhero movies all feel the need to kill off our main characters…but we’ll get to that later.

Deadpool tries to unsuccessfully kill himself multiple times, and each time he is ‘close’ he gets to see Vanessa in this dreamlike afterlife for a brief moment…see, something I liked about Deadpool was that is was at least sort of ‘believable’ in a comic book sort of way. But these afterlife sequences struck me not as emotional, but just plain dumb. They did not fit into a movie like this. This is not What Dreams May Come. It’s a humorous superhero movie.

Then, after a strange series of events, Wade goes to jail with a fourteen year old mutant. First off, why would a fourteen year old be going to an adult prison? I understand it’s a prison for mutants, but you’d think they’d definitely separate the kids and adults. Also, the kid was clearly being abused. How did only Deadpool notice and take pity on him?

Anyway, while in jail, they have to wear these collars that take their powers away. Now remember, Wade’s power is that his body instantly heals itself. So how is it that when the collar goes on him, his cancer instantly comes back? Because if we are going by that thinking, that anything his body healed after receiving his powers would be reversed, then wouldn’t every bullet wound, knife slash, and injury that he has sustained since receiving his powers do him in? Otherwise, how is it that the cancer came back so quickly and powerfully? If it was eradicated, it would be gone! It would not come back…and certainly not at such an impact.

Now, the whole jail scene goes on wayyy too long. Why do superhero movies all need jail scenes now, by the way? Guardians of the Captain America: Civil War, Suicide Squad….enough!

I will also add that there were far fewer laughs at this point than in the original. In fact, laughs are pretty rare. And when there is a joke, 4/5 times, it is pretty cheap and unoriginal. That is, the original brought so much original material that any jokes here are pretty much a rehashing or something only a 14 year old boy while laugh at.

This is pretty much where the movie lost me. I realized that my beloved original Deadpool movie was an anomaly. A great treat. And Deadpool 2 would not be the same thing.

While there were a few more laughs as the movie progressed, most of the good one were already shown in the trailer. I kept searching for redeeming qualities and just kept getting let down. There were more plot holes than I could count, and Cable was underwhelming.

I will skip to the end, because that is where it really hits the fan. See, Deadpool even jokes about lazy writing at the fact that Cable can only travel in time twice: once to save his family and once to get back to them. At least he admits the writing is lazy.

Again, after an odd series of events, Deadpool winds up sacrificing himself for that fourteen year old mutant (who has an Australian accent that no one even addresses by the way.) Yup, he joins the ranks of seemingly every other superhero in recent memory and dies. He does so by putting on the collar from prison that strips mutants of their powers and gets hit by a bullet.

But oh, wait, remember how Cable can go back in time? He does that and saves Deadpool. Now, if he really wanted to save Deadpool, why wouldn’t he have just removed the collar as Deadpool was dying so that Deadpool could heal himself? The collars were removable. We had seen it get removed before! Then, he could have saved his time travel.

But nevermind all that, because as soon as the credits start to roll, we see Negasonic Teenage Warhead and her GF repairing Cable’s time travel thingy, and guess what? They save Vanessa. This also allows Deadpool save one of the guys that he rounded up for his team…which makes no sense, as if he has the power to save that guy, why wouldn’t he just prevent his team from jumping out of the helicopter so none of them died? Basically, this scene means that virtually everything that happened in this movie meant nothing.  See when you add time travel into a movie like this, it renders so much of it nonsense.

There were a lot of other issues, but it would take a short book to point them all out.

The best way to describe how I feel is heartbroken. Deadpool was the rebel hero. His movie and comics were something different. He was sassy, funny, daring, AND smart. A part of me wants to purge myself of my Deadpool posters, comics, figurines, and apparel, but I can’t let a bad sequel ruin the love I have for the original. At least we always have the brilliant original…

The Collegiate Environment Requires Careful Strategy for Success

Don’t Believe The Hype

Don’t go to college to find yourself. Don’t go to college to party. You’ll think you’ve found yourself, and you’ll certainly have fun partying—but the rainbow has to come to an end, the night is replaced by the dawn, and your collegiate experience will be traded for debt that could be crippling if you haven’t properly prepared.

Go to college to learn how to live on a budget in terms of food and other necessities, to learn a new discipline, to finish what you start, and to make professional contacts that you may use in later life as an adult. Also, you’ll be living on your own likely for the first time in your life—so choose your living conditions wisely. If you’re lucky you can get a full-ride scholarship.

Ideally, you want some kind of scholarship going into school. Not everyone will get one through their coursework in high school, but here’s the thing: there is always money available. You just have to seek it out. Even if you’re not academically excellent, there are going to be monetary solutions out there if you’re just diligent enough to search.

Scholarship Opportunities

There are collegiate scholarship resource ledgers, your counselors in high school can help you apply for scholarships, if you’re from a lower-income family the FAFSA (Federal Assistance For Student Aid) could help you out, and your ethnic background may also play a part in getting you funding to study.

 

Additionally there are religious institutions that will mete out scholarship, there are tests you can take that can do the same, and the list of opportunities go on. It’s difficult to get a full ride, but if you can turn a $60k degree into a $40k degree, that’s substantial.

 

Here’s the thing: you’re going to be free. You’re going to have fun. And you’re going to want to party—even if you’re a studious individual, these temptations will come. It’s alright to pursue them in moderation, but you can really get yourself into trouble if you’re not careful. You could even lose a scholarship!

 

Choose The Right Degree

Also, the kind of degree you choose could have a big impact on whether or not you see overall success at the end of the day. Lawyers are diminishing in number because the internet provides for many services that previously required an educated professional. Also, a law degree takes time. You may end up spending eight years before you pass the bar.

 

Medical degrees are similar. The thing is, if you do it right, you’ll likely have a lucrative career in fields like this; but there’s no guarantee. That said, collegiate degrees that fill a niche of this kind are more likely to yield success. A political science degree—well, it may get you somewhere; but not much further than just working after high school will. It’s the same for communications, journalism, English, liberal arts, music, theater, and the list goes on.

 

Lingual degrees can be very useful, it will still likely be at least a decade before technological algorithms can totally replace a human translator. Chemistry, biology, and mathematical degrees can likewise be very useful if you’ve got the aptitude. Psychology may or may not work for you in the long-run.

 

The truth is, if you want to escape debt and find a job in your area of study, you’re probably going to have to focus on something about which you’re not necessarily passionate, but which you could see yourself “doing”. This is one reason many are vying by the trade school route today.

Trade Schools And Collegiate Guides

A mechanical trade school will return you a certification that will definitely get you work once you’re done, and you’ll be able to maintain such success going forward provided you put in what you want to get out. It’s not the same for many other degrees; and college loans can take decades to pay off.

 

If you’re trying to learn how to succeed in college, here’s a guide from Phyzzle.com; according to the site, the guide: “…will walk you through how to succeed in college, including exactly how to avoid the most common student pitfalls, and make the most of your classes, job prospects, and overall college experience.”

 

You desperately need assistance determining what you’re going to do in a collegiate sense. The reality is, the modern higher education experience today is much different than it was for your parents, and for their parents. Today college is almost a perfunctory bureaucratic need.

 

As such, you need a degree for even a basic job, but it may not end up getting you any specific occupation. However if you know what to do beforehand through informed decision, you’ll have greater likelihood of succeeding in your career endeavors.

 

 

 

 

 

 

How to Improve Your Memory

Have you ever watched someone counting cards at a poker game and thought how can a person increase the memory to such an extent and have such advanced mind and memory function that they can remember all of those cards? There are a number of ways to develop better mind and memory function on an ongoing basis and one of the best ways is using creative games that improve memory.

If you have been looking for techniques for improving memory, you have probably come across a number of products that can help you. But did you know that underlying the success of all these products is a very simple ‘secret’ technique that can not only be used for improving memory, but also for enhancing many other aspects of your life?

This technique for improving memory is so simple that it would be easy to disregard it. But don’t make that mistake. By making some simple changes to your life you can have a major positive effect on your memory and concentration, regardless of whatever additional techniques you may choose to employ.  As a side benefit, your overall health and quality of life will also improve.

The ‘secret’ technique consists of two things – Exercise and Nutrition!

Our brain is responsible for storing and managing our memories.  It is an absolutely incredible organ that, by and large, we take for granted…until it doesn’t work as well as we would like. However, if we treat it well, it will reward us with excellent powers of recall and concentration.

Regular exercise is absolutely critical to good brain health and to improving memory. It increases the flow of blood and oxygen to the brain and helps to clear away any waste products. Exercise also stimulates the production of the ‘feel good’ chemicals in our brain, such as endorphins, which help us to approach life, learning and memory improvement in a much more engaged and constructive way.

Exercise is a great technique for improving memory because it calms us down, helps us to breathe more evenly and deeply, and removes the stress and ‘fuzziness’ of mind that prevents our memories from being stored and recalled efficiently.

Providing proper nutrition is also a critical ‘technique’ for improving memory.  In some respects the brain is like an incredibly complex machine that needs top quality fuel to function at its best.  Natural, unprocessed foods are great for improving memory and concentration.

It also pays to have a look at what you drink.  Drinking plenty of fresh water can greatly assist your clarity of mind. Be mindful that stimulants such as caffeine will tend to make you feel more ‘jumpy’, instead of calm and focused, which is the best state to be in for improving memory.  Alcohol can also reduce your ability to think clearly and this should be borne in mind if you are focusing on improving your memory.

Author Bio: Sohail is a content marketer and a blogger, currently he is associated with Smiletutor.sg an online tuition agency in Singapore. His hobbies include writing, reading books, traveling and gardening.

 

This Time Next Year on Lifetime

A year doesn’t seem too long, and yet, you look back to a year ago, and everything is different.
 
This past year, I graduated with my masters and began earning my doctorate. I experienced the grief of dealing with a family member’s life-threatening illness and the loss of a dog (who was more like a brother) that I had since I was seven years old. I learned the joy of rescuing a new puppy and traveled across the country by myself for the first time. I started a new business. Wrote a new book. And worked on taking back my world record…
 
I am honored to announce that you can see my year unfold on Lifetime network this January. A group of amazing and inspirational people..and me…chronicled a year in our lives and our attempts to accomplish various goals and dreams. Then, we chatted with Kat Deeley about it..yes, she is every bit as sweet as she appears on the screen.
ITV0043_TTNY_KeyArt_Press_AW-450x306
 
So watch this brand new show, This Time Next Year, and the journey a year can take you on. On Lifetime this January.

Overthinking? 7 Habits of Highly Mindful People

Smart people have the hardest time finding love because they overthink, overanalyze and generally treat love like a math puzzle or science project and not like the natural, biological process that it is.

The most important part of connecting with a romantic prospect, or anyone in life, is being totally present. This means putting ego aside, developing consciousness and keeping mental noise on the lowest volume possible. It takes work, but once you lay the foundation, it’s much simpler.

Here are Miss Alpha’s tips for building that foundation:

 

  1. Eat healthy.
    Sugar, caffeine, aspartame, flour, and excess salt all create agitation, which can make our minds race. We get used to it, we become addicted, and it causes us to manically overthink. If you want to be calm, start with the right fuel.

 

  1. Exercise.
    When you use your nervous energy to work out, there’s less fuel for that useless, noisy, mental fire.

 

  1. Meditate.
    Meditation clears mental clutter. It creates the ability to focus and really listen and connect with others. It relaxes you, which builds confidence regardless of alcohol intake. Meditation allows you to be authentic.

There are different types of meditation. I highly recommend “Mindfulness Meditation,” which means clearing the mind and stopping all thought. This video walks you through the process. Please do not be afraid of the quiet that is inevitable. It’s a good thing.

 

  1. Take time for personal reflection.

Journaling enables you to see your own behavior patterns – both good and bad – and being aware of what behaviors create your life is the most critical part of making changes.

  1. Recognize that “mind-reading” is presumptuous and arrogant.

No matter how well you know someone, even if they are an open book, there is always more to that person. Let their actions speak; get to know people during the time you are actually engaging with them. If all else fails, consider how insulting it would be for someone to presume that you are so simple, they’ve got you all figured out?

Per the immortal words of Jack Johnson:

Now please don’t pretend to know what’s on my mind
If we already knew everything that everybody knows
We would have nothing to learn tonight.

 

  1. Stop daydreaming!
    Feel free to daydream about your future life, your ambitions, traveling the world, falling in love; but don’t attach it to a person. People build fantasies about their romantic prospects and are easily hurt when things don’t line up. If you want something, speak up and ask for it. If you can’t do that, it’s time to find something else to think about.

 

  1. Accept it.
    If you want to succeed, you have to do what works. This means recognizing that there is nothing inherently wrong with your person; it’s just the behavioral ruts that you’ve created. While it’s not foolproof – I still obsess and fret occasionally. With a little discipline, things get a lot easier.

 

We worry because we think that worry gives us control over what the other person may do that affects us… but that is simply not true. Worrying it not a superpower. All it does is create stress and detract from a more luscious and fulfilling existence. So take a deep breath and realize that you can’t control others, you can only control yourself.

 

About the Author

This post contributed by Alicia Wise, a featured writer for Loveawake.com free dating site. Alecia is a well-accomplished bilingual writer for magazines, websites and newspapers about relationships, online dating and marriage. She teaches online marketing and self-motivation on hedowntimeme.